Kisah Sebelum Internship di RSDC Wisma Atlet / Rumah Sakit Darurat Penanganan Covid 19 Wisma Atlet

        RSDC Wisma Atlet pertama kali dijadikan wahana untuk internship dokter pada bulan Mei 2020 untuk para Peserta Dokter Internship Indonesia / PIDI periode II tahun 2020. Dibuka karena memang ada permintaan khusus dari RSDC Wisma Atlet, agar para PIDI bisa juga ditempatkan di RSDC WA, karena pada saat itu sangat sulit mendapatkan dokter yang mau menjadi relawan disana. Akhirnya khusus PIDI periode II tahun 2020 muncul beberapa wahana baru yang merupakan pusat rujukan Covid. Jadi sebutan untuk dokter intershipnya pun dijuluki ''angkatan covid''.

Akhirnya terlaksana lah pemilihan wahana internship dokter yang penuh drama,

- yang awalnya (katanya) pemilihan periode Mei ditiadakan. Tiba-tiba diadakan :)

- cuma boleh pilih wahana sesuai domisili, 

    sedangkan gue domisili Banten, dan saat itu Banten sama sekali ga ada wahana yang buka, kan maksudnya apa coba? 

    fyi, harusnya gue iship Februari, mau di Balaraja, walau kerja lembur bagai quda tapi katanya ada insentif 2jt+ dan masih deket rumah. Tapi ga dapet lol. Buat gue, nganggur nunggu iship itu gaenak, walau lo punya sampingan jaga sana sini kek, tetep aja gaenak. Jadi gue bertekad apapun yang terjadi, periode Mei gue harus berangkat intership, mau ke papua kek, pokoknya harus berangkat. Titik. Dan karena muak nganggur lama, gue berfikir mau ke Bali atau daerah yang santai dan berduit lol. Tapi ekspektasi ga sesuai kenyataan, harus milih sesuai domisili. Tapi daripada gue nganggure lagi, gue pun tetep milih lokal dan regional, di Lampung. Dapet di RSUD Pringsewu, Lampung, dari pemilihan regional. tapi...

- bentrok sama PSBB dan Pembatasan Transportasi Nasional

rumah gue di Tangerang. Transportasi jalur darat, air, udara semua lagi pada stop. Kalaupun bisa ditempuh, penuh syarat. Dan KIDI bilang gamau keluarin surat tugas perjalanan, salah sendiri disuruh pilih domisili kok malah pilih jauh-jauh. pokoknya kalo pas pembekalan iship ga ada di daerah wahana, kena pinalti 1 tahun. lol. Tapi ujungnya di akhir dikasih surat tugas dan keringanan kalo telat sampe di wahana, prank gak tuh?

- gak boleh hamil, gabisa mengundurkan diri, gabisa ngajuin pindah wahanan atas dasar apapun. Kalo sampe iya, pinalti 1 tahun.

Tapi ujungnya semua itu hanya abu-abu

Gue kuliah dan koas di Lampung dan sejujurnya muak harus di Lampung lagi. Kaya udah males aja gitu semua gak sesuai ekspektasi. Temennya dia dia lagi, suasana itu lagi. Duh...

sampai pas hari pemilihan nasional dapet info buat yang dapet wahana ga sesuai domisili, boleh mengajukan relokasi. tapi gak bisa milih wahana relokasinya dimana, yang jelas bakal ditempatin ke wahana sesuai domisilnya. Gak pake mikir gue langsung ajuin. 

Gue udah curiga bakal ditempatin di Wisma Atlet, karena udah ada desas desus wisma atlet mau dibuka. Tapi wahana wisma atlet ga muncul bahkan di pemilihan nasional. Tapi isunya super kenceng. Jadi gue fikir yav dimana lagi... rumah gue dia Tangerang, Banten gak ada wahana yang buka, wahana yang paling deket sama domisili cuma RSDC. Dan hipotesis terbukti.

Interest-Losing.

Do you realize there are times in life that we lost interests with something that we usually love or like doing it. We don't mean to be like that, but one thing to another, it just the way it is. 

For example, it's almost already new year, I remember how I was really into waiting it a few years before. Because new year only comes once a year and absolutely because in a count of days after new year I'll be another years older. (January, 5^th, Hehehe Happy Birthday Jess.) I could go to the market and pick every fireworks and squib I like. Go around the city, visit my big family, blow a trumpet, burn the squib with my brother and sister and the most wonderful moment is watching fireworks on the night sky. I enjoy every moment all the way it goes. I used to stay up late against boring time and sleepy eyes just because I don't wanna miss new year's eve celebrations. But now I think I have lost my interest in it. Well, not all, just some part of it.

 Another example is aerobics, I usually did aerobics at leasts twice a month, hehe. Actually I learnt about aerobics when I was on my last year at elementary school but it has becomes my routines since junior high school years and I still love doin' it till my second year at senior high school I guess. To me, aerobics is not always about gymnastic movements but more about health. Aerobics is the only kind of sports that I can do every time I want and I have an aerobics dvd from my pal. After my second year at high school over, I lost my appetite in it. Besides that, an accident that broke my heart that day(about aerobics groups for aerobics practice) + my aerobics dvd wasn't able to used anymore makes this situations more bad. Bad, but still, when I see aerobics movements, I do still have the love for it, just not as big as before. Another kind of interest-losing, perhaps.

Well, it just two examples of what happening to me in the current of time. It makes me realize that we do relly lost interests for a few things in life. I lost my interests for almost all holidays. Yap I know holidays are time to relaxing our minds and body, but only if it filled by pleasing activity of course. And the fact, as I grow up, my holidays kebanyakan boringnya, mpas!. Remember when we were little, we're eager and got very enthusiast about it. How about now? Not really into it? We don't feel those holiday spirit, do we? Is it because all the routinity so- called socializing, or work? Is it normal because we're growing up? Or are those things are just not really interesting anymore?
Well again, some people find new things that interests their life. And that's good, lose some and get some. But most important of all, we are the one who choose to lose interests in all of 'em. We got bored of all those things we used to love. We always find reason to leave them behind. From small reasons to the big ones. And sometimes I kinda missing all those things.

• I never lost interest in swimming.
• I never lost interest of travelling. I hope someday I could go to the top of a mountain, again.
• I never lost interest in knowing something new.
• I never lost interest of kepo-ing all about "Him"

Quote:

"No one could loses anything because no one really owns anything."

Awalnya dari aku.

Payah. Ini baru awal dan ini pertempuran pertamaku. Aku sudah kalah dan semakin menjadi pecundang. Bukan terhadap lawanku di sana tetapi lebih kepada diriku sendiri. Semua karena emosi yang berlebihan dan seharusnya tidak perlu. Sekarang, hal yang harus bisa kulakukan adalah belajar menerima dan melepaskan segalanya dengan sepenuh hati. Bahkan ketika aku menganggap diriku ini lemah, payah dan tak lebih dari seorang pecundang, adakah teman yang bisa membuatku kembali tersenyum, berdiri dan membenarkan keslahanku? Mengajari aku bagaimana cara untuk menjadi seorang yang tegar dan ikhlas?

I do really need a hug right now. A huge, long, tight and a warm one :(

Fed-up.

I am home, just now. And I hate hating this hate feeling. I don't want to pour my heart with bad feelings and other negative things. I do want to throw every lil bad in me. This situation keeps pressing me. No one cares about what grows inside me. I am fed-up. If only I could go to somewhere :(
That guy on GO, is so disgusting as always, and today he is thousand times more disgusting than usually. I was doing my test, and I hate it when he take a sit right besides me and keep disturbing me by trying to make convo with me. He keeps talking with iewh voice. Crap! Why must me? Why don't he sit on another chairs. so many empty chairs in that class. Bad luck.
When I got home, I feel like want to explode. My mom told me about where the college that inevitably I couldn't say no. I am sick. Conversation about college always end up with my heart tore.
All I just wanna say is I hate my day. My day just lil by lil becomes worse and worse and I don't know whether it will stops either at worst point or better point.

No handphone, still.

It’s been a year, without handphone. After December, 2011, I lost my phone. My 3^rd. Sometimes, I hate myself and don’t get why I could be this clumsy. 2012 already almost touch the finish line. A year, and I haven’t had new phone yet. Huh yasudahlah. Ikhlas sajalah.

Let it be,

"He's just too kind, even more than you know. Perhaps Allah wants him to be with a gooood girl, and now I'm still not good enough for him, so here I am holding a jar of hopes. If he likes another girl, maybe it's called karma. Suck, it really hurts but I deserve it. I had done very bad things to him, even hurt that I feel right now means nothing."

Sunday..

Kerja kelompok yang berlih fungsi jadi acara narsis. Selalu. Ini serius, Kimia tentang sel volta dan kerabatnya itu, belom sama sekali dipelajarin dan mencoba melajarin sendiri itu berujung ke jalan buntu. Untung saja punya teman satu kelompok yang ngerti ya :')
Oh iya.. rambut gue baru. Bosan dengan rambut lama. dan ini foto pertama dengan rambut bru :-D

These are hard times for dreamer

Motivation is the most important thing needed rightnow. Dreams oh dreams. Too many dreams I want to hold. But we all are know its not as easy a it said. Butuh kerja keras tingkat tekanan dasar laut terdalam untuk bisa ada di titik itu. Berapa ratus juta orang di Indonesia yang lagi ada di posisi gue?  Berapa ratus juta orang yang akan jadi saingan gue? Gue gak mau cuma bilang WOW tapi ngilangin patogen yang menimbulkan laziness itu susah bro. Jadi sekarang melaksanakan things to do list itu harus jadi prioritas nanti dreams bakal jadi award-nya insyaAllah. Gue gak mau cuma jadi dreamer. Setidaknya, sukses di futurelife cukuplah. Lagipula ada hal lain disamping sekedar jadi dream catcher yang nyemangatin gue, semoga benar semua mimpi itu :')